“Well, your father is right love. You can’t go around asking your friends to punch you in the face to knock a tooth out. The fairy will know.”
After you check out this site and pages, click on your favorite button here to stalk me on social media. ( or in person at 7pm most nights lurking in the fruit and veg aisle of Lidl)
That's me in the corner, losing my 'street cred'. Taking a selfie in a Cardiff coffee shop and slurping on some delicious miso broth. After landing on the home page and forming a picture of me in your mind, did you have me down as a four-eyed bald middle-aged soup slurper? (57 is the new 37)
Walk This Way...
About the Site. What’s in it for you.
Well you know my name and see from the menu buttons that I’m into a lot of things; Throughout lockdown, it was mostly the fridge. I believe that all the subjects covered are interlinked. I’m here typing to you mostly as a writer though. ( that’s the ‘Stories‘ link explained then). This site has been two years in the thinking and researching and writing suitable stories and stuff to go into it.
The’ blog ‘will be random life stuff with my own personal view of the world. You know when a dog tilts his head to one side in a questioning yet cute kind of way, well that will be my perspective on things. To push your visual button click on the video buttons to play fun random stuff in my blog. I used button twice there. not good writing etiquette, I shall use the word ‘link’ instead of ‘button’ ,it sounds better than button. Random clips and photos of my day while I am out and about and maybe indoors. Button.
‘Audio Poems‘. I’m not very good at poetry ( nor at writing short humorous stories I hear you cry). I dabble and have been published. I will read out my poems so you can’t see the gramur and spilling errors. Actually, on some of them, there will be scrolling text so you can read them at the same time. Like a lot of unawesome writers, I do slip up from time to time and feel free to tell me when I do.
‘Travel‘. I have traveled widely throughout the UK during the last few years ( and when we could during lockdown pauses) to get inspiration for my stories . Unfortunately I had to eat out a lot in nice places to get motivation to come up with new dishes to go in my stories and post recipes of these on the ..wait for it…the Recipes page. Talking of which, look what’s next…
‘Recipes‘ Ah! Now, this is where it becomes even more interesting. Yes,” how can this be?” you ask yourself. Well, food is mentioned rather a lot in my work. I don’t really like the word ‘foodie’ as it overused and, as every living thing on this particular planet needs food to survive, it would make us all ‘foodies’.( over use of the word ‘food’ there? I might as well throw in ‘button’). Would ‘ eater ‘ sound as cool though? “I am an eater.” “Wow! me too.” Anyway, I am a qualified professional chef and that is why I will be writing a bit about what fills me up and the stuff I use to make the journey from my mouth to my belly a really pleasant one. The only cooking I do these days is at home. I chose to write full-time as a proper job. Fill in your sarky comment here.(………………………………………………. ).
Freelance writing page. ‘Does exactly what it says on the tin’.( I know someone who knows the woman who came up with that saying). This service mixes in with the other pages I think. It’s not like I’m promoting a one-stop site for cricket, cryptocurrency, knitting , Gorilla grooming and mosquito racing. The freelance page is a place where I flog myself ( and no, you can not see me do that in any video blogs , you sicko). This link is all about how I can pay my butlers and maids wages. I offer my mind and fingers for a miniscule fee. I put them to work and hopefully you will like what they come up with.
Is this perhaps the most important page on my site? Over Thinking Mind Blog I will post links to many helpful books and sites which helped me on my wellbeing journey. I am a daily meditator and strive to live as much as I can in the present moment. I have developed the knack of becoming aware of when my thoughts take over . It has taken many years of practice and reading some truly amazing books on the subject. I have completed a number of university courses on teaching mindfulness, acceptance and commitment therapy and counselling. I would like to share with you how I learnt I to control my overthinking and realize every time my mind tried to take me on a road trip to places I didn’t particularly want to go. It is all amazing stuff. Please leave messages in the comment box if there is anything I can help you with.( Not D.I.Y , car mechanics or indoor plants though).
So, a the mix of links here that complement each other and can be intertwined and hopefully engaging.
What About Me?
“The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why.” – Mark Twain. (I wonder if this website is why I’m here ?)
First and foremost , I would call myself ‘unusual’, in the nicest possible way. Who really wants to live in a world where everyone is normal? Quirky on a grand scale.
Random Facts about me.
1. I was born in Cardiff in 1964 and was almost called Cameron. I am half Welsh half Scottish.
2. I eat porridge with cold milk, turmeric ,curly kale, blueberries and raw broccoli for breakfast. Not in the same bowl.
3. I have a short attention spa…..oh look! Cake.
4. I have a cold shower every morning.
5. I play the piano and guitar.( Not at the same time; yet)
6. I went on holiday to Turkey in 1988 and stayed for 8 years.
7. I’ve gone off the word ‘button’.
8. Cheese is where I go to meditate.
9.As a boy, I use to pretend I lived in the big house in my street. I would stand outside it by the gate and wait till the school buses went by and wave to my friends.
10. I have always had to look up how to spell ‘Broccollii’.
11. I was alone in a hospital lift once with Sir Anthony Hopkins not long after I had seen the ‘Hanibbal’ film.
12. For over 20 years I have met my best friend from school every weekday lunch time.
13. I eat cold tinned sardines or mackerel everyday. I absolutely love seafood.
14. I meditate an hour or more each day and practice living in the now as much as I can. I can’t recommend it enough. It really can give you superpowers .
15. I participated in a mock operation with the S.A.S.
16. I am the Great Grandson of the Welsh novelist and Playwright. Jack Jones.
17. I cycled naked through the streets of Cardiff for 2 hours. Got lots of cheers and waves. It wasn’t just me though. An organized event.( Yeah yeah, I hear you mutter ).
18. Lastly; I kept the best to last. I am the very proud father of an amazingly talented kind young man that you could ever wish for.
The Big Reveal is Next..Read on
Ian is my name. I mostly write short humorous stories. Hopefully they will make you at least smile out loud, if not then perhaps we should start seeing other people. This site exists because I like to get stuff off my chest (especially my moobs ).
I will endeavor to keep you entertained with all items on the menu . It’s a loaded blog with themes that bounce off each other. As a’ has-been’ professional chef you will see a lot of food references in some of my meanderings and pages.
Meanwhile, here are snippets from a couple of my stories to wet your appetite. (See what I did there?) It will give you an insight to how these stories escape from my mind and out to my fingers.
From ‘First Pantry Day’.
“Ah, Mrs Jones, could I have a word before you take Lloyd home?”
Mum looked up and smiled at Mrs Silcox while doing up my coat.
“It’s just that we had an incident at dinner time today. It seems young Lloyd here didn’t have any food and was rather hungry this afternoon. I gave him some biscuits from the staff room and one of my sandwiches. I hope you don’t mind.”
“But I gave him a lunch box full of his favourite things and put in his satchel this morning.”
“Yes, I know.”
Mum looked lost.
“It appears that Lloyd sold them all.”
Mum stared questioningly at me. I tried to mimic her bemused look and shrugged my shoulders making out Mrs Slicox had lost the plot. She looked at me harder as if penetrating my thoughts. I could cry here or keep up my ‘I’ve been framed’ guise.
“I find this hard to believe Mrs Silcox.” said mum as she fastened the last button on my duffel coat, still holding her gaze at me. “Is this true Lloyd?”
I kept my poker face.
“Um, I may also add that it was not for financial gain Mrs Jones.”
Mum stood up and level with my teacher.
“What on earth do you mean?
Read it in full on the Stories page.
From ‘ Come on Praline‘.
“There you go love, your new dress is dry now and you can’t see the orange stain, now let’s sit down and finish our drinks, eat your cake and we can finish your birthday shopping.”
My mouth stopped mid munch.The contents of chewed up praline ,sponge ,jam and cream on view for everyone to see. The mother, confused at first, looked around thinking she may have the wrong table. She looked at the cake in my hand, the coffee and orange juice. I focused my gaze on the old man, willing him to say something to make this extremely awkward situation seem like an innocent mistake. As if reading my mind, he spoke.
“Seems this thieving git here stole your cake love and gave us some cock and bull story that it was his girlfriend’s”
The little girl started to cry.
( Full version on Stories page ).
If you like this so far; although don’t hold your breath, it gets worse, share this page with other people by clicking on a social media link.